“Dad and E are okay and we are leaving the hospital now. And we are bringing E home with us.”
Those were the words spoken by my mother when she called to give me an update after my dad had been involved in a head-on car crash at the intersection of St. Rt. 48 and Alex Bell Road, in the little town of Centerville, Ohio, where I grew up.
“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:35 NIV
I was reading this morning about the celebratory and vindictive social media posts delighting in the destruction of the personal life of a Philadelphia Eagles fan. He had berated and insulted a Green Bay Packers fan and the interaction caught on video. I read way too often of people celebrating the demise or destruction of their fellow, flawed human teammates. What happened to forgiveness. What happened to grace. What happened to loving the sinner and hating the sin?
“They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!” Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust. When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?” “No, Lord,” she said. And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.” John 8:7-11 NLT
If someone were to ask me today to define how our culture has changed in a few words, I guess that I would say we have moved ‘reflect to deflect.’ I recently wrote and speak often of the danger of moving a mirror a few degrees. By it very definition, a mirror exists to reflect what is placed in front of it. Yet I see standards being established for judgement and the meting out of “social justice” based up a ‘move focus’ model. You see a mirror moved a few degrees will take away one’s reflection and focus our eyes and hearts on that and those around us instead of reflecting what lies within us.
The scripture that I listed above from John chapter 8 is the ending of the story where a woman had been accused of adultery, an action at the time that resulted in death by stoning. Interestingly, John does not bother to tell us whether this woman was guilty or innocent. Nor does Jesus. But the story does tell us that Jesus began writing in the sand and caused the accusing men who had moved the mirror from focusing on them to focusing on this woman. Jesus righted the position of the mirror and I have heard compelling thoughts that he began writing the names of these accusing men’s mistresses. I am so thankful that God says “I’ll handle the judgement,” freeing me of this burden too great for a sinful man like me.
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” Matthew 7:3-5 ESV
I have tried the judge and executioner life model and the truth is that I am really, really good at it; to no one’s benefit and my own detriment. So after decades of self congratulating for a life of self indulgent gratification and complete brokenness, I choose to fail and try again at love first. An example that my parents showed me when my very close, personal friend hit my father head-on in a car crash that sent them both to the hospital.
When my mom and dad arrived home from the hospital after the head-on collision, I learned that one of my best friends from church and school had been the person who hit my dad. I then watched my mom fix my dad and friend dinner. I listened as my dad assured E that everything would be okay as E was convinced his life was over when his parents got a hold of him. I watched my mother make sure that my friend was filled with food and showered with love. I witnessed my human parents, filled with their own failings and issues, focus on loving and caring for the cause of the wreck and his healing, minimizing the physical wreck and maximizing the person.
E and I have lost touch and he has built a beautiful life for he and his family. Everything that I know about him suggests that he is a good man. I choose to remember with fondness and love our formative years of growing, failing, learning and laughing. I choose to believe that my parents exhibited Jesus to E that fateful evening. I choose to believe that I learned the value of the person is greater than their sin.
I choose the love that allowed Jesus to choose me.